Contrary to what my father would tell me in the middle of the night when I was a child, I now find it incredibly reassuring as an adult to learn that things I have nightmares about actually exist. I was listening to the ADAM CAROLLA PODCAST the other day (which is absolutely hilarious by the way) and some guy on there from SURVIVOR was talking about these things they had to deal with, and ultimately eat, while filming on some remote island in the Pacific. They’re called COCONUT CRABS and they’re basically 100 times scarier than the first ALIEN movie. That’s a regular sized trash can in case you’re in disbelief… or denial. I stopped short at posting the picture of one of these crabs that had attached itself to a man’s torso.
Then, just having gotten over that regrettable discovery from last week… I get slapped in the face by a YAHOO NEW STORY about NOMURA JELLYFISH today. As if tiny jellyfish weren’t horrible enough, this species decided to go all in on tipping terrifying scale and top out at over 6 feet wide and 450 pounds.
Moral of the story: Meth-riddled rednecks in Panama City are definitely not the scariest ocean creatures you can ever come across while vacationing at the beach.
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